This is Christmas
I want to take a pause today from my regular content to tell you about someone who changed my life last night. Yes, just last night, my heart learned something it never knew before and, shame on me if it ever forgets.
I made a new friend recently, one who is going through some hard things. Even in her own pain, she prays the sweetest spirit-filled prayers for my family and me. She remembers things about me that just come up in flippant conversation, like that I take dance class and that I love chocolate chip cookies. I have never seen anyone with so much to pray for in her own life be so selfless. She is a great mother, and we are like-minded in many things. She is funny and fun to be around. I am so glad I get to call her friend. The more I get to know her, the more I marvel at her resilience. I mean, jaw-dropping resilience! I see legacy in her that is breaking chains of generational curses and I have a peace in my spirit that knows the devil is not going to take her down.
Recently, as I was out Christmas shopping, I thought of her and her kiddos and wanted to give them Christmas gifts. As in my last post, I was filled with the excitement that comes with buying gifts for people who will appreciate them and feel loved by them. Again, I hardly know these people, but it’s not hard to love them already. So, I picked up some items that I thought her little ones would like, but I was not sure about her middle daughter. By the time I saw her next, I only had gifts for her and the two young ones. So, we made plans to get together last night so we could finish the exchange, and she said she also had something for me. “It’s not much,” she texted.
This friend and I have some pretty heavy conversations, but last night was just plain old fun! I gave her a small bag for her older daughter, and we talked and laughed about all kinds of things. Then, as we were leaving, she said she had my gifts in her car, so we bypassed my own vehicle and walked out to hers. She opened the trunk and I saw a box filled with wrapped presents. She pulled two off the top, and my thought was that she was carrying around gifts to give to people as she saw them this season. But no! She lifted out the whole box, stacked two that had fallen off on top, and handed it to me. As she did, I noticed that some were labeled for my kids.
I didn’t know what to say—I just stood there in the cold with the box in my arms and a dumb look on my face while she closed her trunk as nonchalantly as if handing someone that many presents was an everyday occurrence for her. I finally found my voice and exclaimed her name. She explained that some of them were for another friend of ours, so I told her I would make sure he got them.
“Do you want me to walk with you to your car in case your door is locked?” she asked. I was still standing there speechless.
She took the box from me and carried it across the parking lot to my car. I opened the trunk and she set the box inside. I thanked her but didn’t have enough words to express how much it meant to me that she wanted to bless us so much. We parted ways, and I drove home thinking about the exchange.
When I arrived home, I lifted the box out of the trunk and realized just how heavy it was. I barely got my arms around it and had to knock on my front door so that my daughter could open it for me. She exclaimed when all she could see was my eyes above the gift tower in my arms. “Mom! Who are those for?”
She helped me set them down and I explained it was from my new friend, and we started to put the packages under the tree. That’s when I realized why it was so heavy. There were not just a few wrapped clothing boxes, as it had appeared from the top; there were dozens of individually wrapped packages in that box, all labeled for me, my kids, and our friend. My daughter was pulling them out to put them under the tree when I told her to stop and put them back because it was literally going to fill up the space under our Christmas tree and I needed to make room for them!
It is not often that I’m speechless, but last night, after the house was quiet and the tree stood twinkling in the darkness, I gazed upon those gifts in awe. An almost physical force pulled me to my knees in humble awareness of the true sacrificial meaning of Christmas. This woman didn’t give because she wanted us to have material things; she gave as an expression of love and thankfulness for the friendship that has begun between us. Have I ever been that selfless? Have I ever touched the heart of Christ like that?
We’ll open those packages on Christmas morning, and they will be the most precious gifts we will receive this year, and possibly ever. It is not the quantity that touched me but the heart behind it, and the reminder that we cannot out-give God. Like God’s gift to us on Christmas Day, I can hardly comprehend how I could possibly deserve this. Most likely, I don’t. And that’s kind of the point.