In Her Words…
I came across an article recently that put together a lot of thoughts I have had myself and have heard from other suddenly- and reluctantly-single moms. Being a single mom puts us at a time, energy, and financial disadvantage, especially when we are already homeschooling and desire to keep it that way.
When I became single, I quickly learned that the local homeschool community was set up for moms who don’t have full-time jobs. That makes sense: homeschooling indicates you are home. And I was home while I was married. But after my divorce, I went from homeschooling my kids for 14 years to suddenly working as a teacher in a small private school. My working hours were the same as the homeschool co-op hours, and there was little they would do to work with me. I was told, “There are no exceptions.” After basically begging leadership to allow me to do something behind the scenes instead of teaching at the co-op so that my son could benefit from the classes, she told me I could schedule out the curriculum for the year and that she would make sure she told all of the other participants so that they knew I was serving. So, in addition to my already profound embarrassment from being a divorced Christian, my situation was going to be advertised.
There were other co-ops available which, instead of helping teach the classes, you could pay more to drop your child off, but with my meager income, that didn’t work for me either. My husband was only ordered to pay $600 in homeschooling expenses for BOTH kids for the entire school year, and that was not even enough to cover one child’s sport for one season.
This article goes into a little more statistical detail about what it’s like financially to become a single mom, and she offers advice on how to continue homeschooling while you work. Note that the author doesn’t even factor in the constant legal fees that come with divorce.
So why am I sharing this with you, Church?
Because my story is not the only one like it. I’ve spoken with numerous women who find little to no support in their homeschooling communities after divorce because the community simply isn’t prepared for that. But we know that churches are. Does your church have a Single Parent fund? Is there money set aside for women who find themselves suddenly without support, trying to provide for their kids and keep their lives as normal as possible? Consider creating one. Consider providing things like:
Scholarships for homeschooling needs
Free childcare for times when mom has to be at a homeschooling event to fulfill her service requirements (because that’s how homeschooling organizations exist)
Jobs for some of these single ladies so they can work in a safe, like-minded place while they get on their feet.
You can be the Samaritan! I encourage you to talk to the single moms in your church and see what the felt needs are so that you can support them in a time when everything else is unstable. If you are interested in learning more, please email voicesrise2023@gmail.com.